#cracked crab
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NEW CRAB ZORA OC!!! I love him so much his name is Zeffrim
I was gonna wait until I finished my other Zora oc but I couldn't wait to post him, I got so excited 😭
#botw#loz#loz botw#zora#oc#zora oc#breath of the wild#legend of zelda#crab zora#loz totk#tears of the kingdom#HIS NAME IS ZEFFRIM#He's a royal guard Zora 😍#HE WORKS ON THE MAIN ENTRANCE BRIDGE#he can't swim as well as other zoras#he's a crab guys 😍#I put a crack in the blue part on his head#haha get it?#cracked crab#lmao#zeffrim
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Bellatrix: Now that the Ministry has fallen, we can set about accomplishing our central goal of-
Voldemort: Finding a way for me to defeat Harry Potter personally in a duel.
Bellatrix: --purifying wizarding bloodlines by--
Draco: Did someone mention Harry Potter?!
Snape: Potter! Everything comes back to him. My whole life would have been different if only-
Bellatrix: Ok is there anyone here NOT obsessed with Harry Potter?
Fenrir Greyback: I'm just here to bite people lol.
Bellatrix: *facepalms* I'm starting to miss Azkaban.
#Lucius raising his hand: *I'm* not obsessed with-- Bellatrix: *silence crab meme*#crack#incorrect harry potter quotes#bellatrix lestrange#Voldemort#Draco Malfoy#drarry#Severus Snape#Fenrir Greyback#Harry Potter#humor#q
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currently thinking about a universe where having your own whumpee(s) is like. a widespread thing. and i want to dump my train of thought somewhere so here you go
stronger/more durable whumpees are worth more because they last longer — maybe they’re used as lab rats for whumper to test a new torture device or weapon
on the other side of the spectrum, weaker whumpees are worth less — maybe they’re usually bought in bulk
whumpees being bought and given to family members as gifts during the holidays (like a dog — pet whump possibilities??)
“buy one, get one free”
“handcuffs/weapon(s) not included”
online quizzes telling you what kind of whumpee would be best for you (again, like a dog)
immortal/super-powered whumpees being auctioned off (i have the mental image of whumpee being in a cage in front of a crowd like in that one jurassic park movie idk)
whumpers trading whumpees
whumpees being used as currency; whumpers exchanging whumpees for food/resources/weapons
whumpees being labeled as “new” or “used”
whumpers complaining to each other about how much weapons/handcuffs/etc cost now because of how many people are using them
#this post probably makes no sense#but oh well#whump#whump prompts#whump idea#whump prompt#whump tropes#whump community#whumpblr#whump scenario#whumpers#whumpees#whumper#whumpee#crack whump#<- kind of??#thoughts of a crab
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had to write this concept before i forgot it, lol. tw: toji! x chubby!reader, reader is mentioned to be bratty and submissive, use of pet names (mama, sugar, baby), breeding!, reader being cock drunk and toji is pussy drunk like a mf. per usual, i write with black women/woc in mind but all are welcome to read and enjoy. love ya!
toji fucks his pretty chubby bunny like there’s no tomorrow every. single. time.
now of course it took the two of you a bit of time to get comfortable with each other. and by the two of you, i mean you. at first, you were apprehensive to toji seeing you in a bra, much less completely nude!
but after a couple of months, the two of you grew to love each other and your guard completely crumbled to the ground. finally allowing toji to see you, whenever he wanted, however he wanted.
hence why now, it doesn’t matter the occasion, time, or place, when he can fuck you. but just how many times he can get u to cum before he does.
and right now, in your shared candle lit bedroom, he’s at a record number of three…
“jesus fucking christ baby, love it when you lemme fuck ya like this” toji says in between thrusts. there’s sweat beading at his hair line, causing his raven black hair to dampen ever so slightly.
mindless babbles and cries leave your lips as a response, causing him to chuckle and stroke you at a painfully slow pace.
“c’mon baby, talk ta me. lemme know how good i make ya feel.” he’s in your ear, but it feels like his voice is traveling all over you. at this point, you’re so delirious, it feels like he’s talking from inside your head.
“toji y’feel s’good. wanna do this f’rever” you say with a heavy tongue, glossy lips, and tears streaming down your face. if you’d have seen yourself right now, you would’ve ran away from him, but toji can only think to himself how beautiful you look right now.
beautiful hair splayed over the pillows in such a perfect way. your sleepy eyes looking up through those beautiful eye lashes. the perfect nose and full lips. silver jewelry all tangled from the movements, but he doesn’t care. how could he care when your body, that perfect and pliant body, is on display for him? so soft and pretty. smelling of vanilla, you’re like his own piece of heaven. one that he gets to build up and tear down each time you let him.
it’s why each time you let him fuck, he does it like he wants to put you through the mattress.
“forever huh? maybe you should quit that stupid job like i told ya. stay at home and sit pretty for me while i take care of ya. would ya like that mama? tell me sugar.” he’s baiting you, but you’re too cock drunk to care.
“yessss! yesyesyesyes! i’ll quit, i’ll do wha’ever toji jus please don’t stop” your eyes are crossing and your toes are curling. it’s quite shocking how toji can turn such a bratty girl like you into such a submissive and mailable mess.
but he wouldn’t want it any other way.
“‘kay baby. i won’t stop. not gonna till i fill ‘er up. make ya a mama. oh! yer lil pussy must reallyyy like that idea, she tightened up on me, hehe” he says. but his strokes are getting sloppier by the second, so you know he’s close too.
without a second thought, toji sticks his thumb in your mouth and you automatically suck on it. he pulls it out with a ‘pop’ and rubs tiny circles on your clit. it makes your legs shake while you attempt to close them despite toji’s body being in the way.
he grabs your face with his other hand and kisses you deeply, tongue swiping over your bottom lip before entering your mouth. at this point, the two of you are moaning and whining into each others mouths like some horny teens.
it’s amazing how your neighbors haven’t complained about the noise yet.
toji removes his mouth from yours and buries his head in your neck, “gonna cum baby. want it inside?” his voice is gravely and his thrusts are getting harder by the second.
“yes toji! wan’ it inside me!” you manage to whine out.
didn’t have to tell him twice, “okay baby, g’nna give it to ya- ah- fuck! there ya go baby. there ya fuckin go. take it all”. he’s cumming so hard that his jaw locked, forcing him to talk through his teeth. his hands pry your legs open as far as they can go, trying to savor as much of you as he can before the sensitivity kills him.
you can feel the warmth from his cum shoot deep into you, which triggers your fourth orgasm of the night. the two of you are mindlessly grinding against each other while riding out your highs. toji making note to not drop his full weight onto you, but hold you close, which results in you being elevated slightly off the bed.
soon after, you can feel toji set you down gently and lay on top of you. hes stroking your hair and wiping your tears away until he hears you let out a loud breath.
“ya back with me mama?” voice laced with concern.
“m’okay now toji.” you say with a slightly shakey voice. your hand comes up to brush some of his hair out from in front of his eyes.
toji sits back on his knees, still inside you, and examines your face and upper body for any signs of him being too rough.
“was scared i hurt ya. i know i can get a lil too rough at times” he says while rubbing your boobs gently.
you let out a small laugh and adjust yourself on the bed, causing your hips to move back slightly on toji’s dick. he tries not to hiss at the feeling but his brain has turned to mush again and now all he can think about is how good you smell. “you’re never too rough toji. i’d tell you if you were”. you say with such a sweet and gentle smile, meanwhile toji feels like a fucking rabid animal.
and suddenly, he’s laying on top of you again, kissing and sucking on your neck. his hands have moved back down to your thighs where they’ve begun to push your legs back.
his head knocks into your jaw and he licks the side of your mouth. his body is burning hot and he’s running low on stamina, but he can’t help himself.
“good. cause m’still hard”.
#toji x reader#toji x chubby reader#toji x black y/n#toji x y/n#toji thirst#toji x black reader#daddy toji#need him to crack me open like some crab legs#toji makes the brain go brrrrrrr
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Spiders and Crabs are Related
The idea of Morgoth running away, screaming, from Crablor due to Ungoliant-related trauma is hilarious.
#tolkien#tolkien legendarium#silmarillion#tolkien headcanons#tolkien crack#XD#Melkor#Morgoth#Crablor#Macalaurë#Maglor#Crabs#Spiders#My takes
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puppets can be considered arthropods
#exoskeleton....#they are Shelled creatures....#also invertebrates... there were puppets in the cambrian era i just know it...#personally i like to believe they're related to horseshoe crabs. or perhaps shrimp#hm. getting the mental image of a seafood restaurant#and the waiter brings out one of those fuckin. yk the dish with the metal dome on top#they put it down and lift the top - its a lovely steamed puppet with an entire pineapple in their mouth#and the diners dont use crab crackers - they use little craft scissors. the ones with the squiggle blades#theres still like. crab meat inside instead of stuffing. so. but the rest is puppet#no wait its puppet meat! what would puppet meat taste like... fluffy like stuffing.. a little sweet maybe.. sugar spice and everything nice#absolutely unprompted#be free my darling post! into the wild with naught but your own wings to carry you!#man. now i want crab. just a pile of huge crab legs to crack into and devour like a wild animal#while my cat stares at me with her gigantic imploring eyes#silently begging for a tidbit & drilling holes into my head all the while#normal things to pine for Yes?
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Dee & Mac's dynamic is still probably my favorite. I love how they straight up just dislike each other in a (relatively) uncomplicated way and have the weakest bond BY FAR and barely give a shit about each other, but still have this intense level of casual intimacy purely by virtue of decades stuck in the same group codependency pentagon. They're like in-laws.
#iasip#It's probably at least in part just because their actors are married irl and it leaks into the performance but I think it goes deeper#I need another episode with a Dee/Mac centric plot or I'm going to die so bad. 'Charlie and Dee Find Love' is one of my fave#episodes and I have been chasing that high ever since#Just that like 5 second scene where he asks her to crack open that crab leg for him and she shatters it effortlessly and it's all#very casual is so good.#Wheres that post that's like a 3 minute compilation of their interactions I need it for my viewing pleasures
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Stimboard of @mysteryfleshpit National Park :]
🥩 🫁 🥩 / 🫁 🥩 🫁 / 🥩 🫁 🥩
#brain#praying mantis#robot#science#clay cracking#meat#meat grinder#crab#mystery flesh pit#orange#pink#white#stim#stimboard#fav#not request
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a power of peace and healing//your bones run strong
I spent a very long time trying to work out a Stone design and I'm still not settled! I'm sure like my other humanizations of Fallen London entities, I'll come up with a few <3
#blood cw#gore cw#fallen london#fallen london spoilers#whoooo wants to hear my design thoughtsssssss okay so#I colour selected from her art. she's mostly brown but there's a pale peach colour I've chosen to adopt#I think pale orange/pink works well for stone! pastel is like a half colour innit. she's a half judgement. a softer light#she has 'mountain limbs' referenced there's no reason to give her only two#esp since one of her parents is a crab. they're kinda hooved/claws/roots to reflect both her and baz#the outfit and part of the pastels is also that Stone is.... a princess kind of. i wanted to invoke that!#no one would call her this but the idea of 'maiden hidden where she can't be seen secret child of the king' is like. Her#maidens locked away often have pointy hats too. like mountains. solved it. all the neath mysteries. i won#she has cracked and the wound obviously because. folks. stop mining her! stop seeking immortality!! CHILL!!!#she's PROBABLY HAS cursed people but she's overall all ALRIGHT and in a TOUGH SITUATION okay. her dad fucking yeeted her into the dirt#oh she has tears of flint on her face. chose orange eyes bc Remembered Sunlight and blue for the Sky. half-lidded because half-sun.#as the monarch of monsters and princess of Shame I wanted her to look notably Different while not being the biggest deal of the design#you will probably notice the wound before the many odd legs or singular arm. she's way more human than my baz designs too#bc like. ONE WAY you can interpret Stone is to place her in Victorian London. The king has a bastard he is ashamed of at birth and hides he#anyway. other stone ideas are much more garden themed. cat themed. put her in a cat sweater
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Magista x roland..
Idc that it’s impossible- it’s FUNNY AND THEY BELONG AS THE GREEDY CREATURES THEY ARE.
for those without context. Yes, it’s a fucking crab and a isopod-
#roland#art#ship#ship art#crack ship#another crab’s treasure#crab#duchess#Rolagista#TreasureHoard#SHIP NAMESS
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something that’s been on my mind a lot also is like. the potential for conflict between kim and harry because of harry’s can-opening.
kim is obviously deeply repressed and while that’s not necessarily a good thing, and he’s not necessarily happy about being that way, it’s also not up to harry to decide that he needs to be exposed. harry can be good for kim in this context if and only if it’s kim making the decision to open up. it can be good for kim if kim is like “there is no way i can ever be as openly fucked up and embarrassing as this guy. he is a freak and a disaster on a level i could never aspire to. so i guess it’s fine if we’re friends. he can know me a little bit.” then it’s great and they foil each other well and their relationship can be healthy and fulfilling for them both!
but there’s also a version of their relationship that starts out okay but goes down in flames because harry just can’t help himself. he either can’t or won’t stop the prying and kim has no inclination to let harry in. there’s a harry that will push kim’s buttons and provoke him and say or do awful things just to see how kim reacts. there is a kim that has no tolerance for harry’s behavior, no desire to play along, and not enough patience to give him more than one or two chances. and kim wouldn’t be wrong for that! kim has no obligation to give harry chances and no obligation to be vulnerable just because harry wants to know he smoked weed back in his 20s (which is a small complaint of mine. as funny as that dialogue is, i kind of wish that even passing that check didn’t actually give you a secret. kim deserves to be able to say no and doing so is way more consistent with his character.)
yes, sometimes kim NEEDS that little bit of pressure from harry so he has an excuse to do something he wants to do anyway, but that’s exactly it: it’s something he *already wants to do*. like the jackets or the dancing or the cryptid talk. harry’s blundering lack of reservations is an excuse for kim to loosen up on his own- it absolves kim of ultimate responsibility, protecting him, and that allows him to *do* things, freeing him. done this way, the dynamic can be healthy and mutually beneficial. but it’s also good to acknowledge the ways in which harry can try to expose kim in harmful ways that drive them apart.
#sorry.#i can get with kim/harry but only under a specific set of circumstances#so you can take this post as platonic or not because it applies regardless#the fact that they're foils means that all the things that make them work well together can also be huge sources of conflict#and harry has conflict with everyone ever because he's just Like That so. it's not impossible that harry chases kim off too#kim's not going to change in the blink of an eye because harry stumbled into his life#they might gradually influence each other but idk.#sorry i just hate it when people act like it's unequivocally good for harry to crack kim open like a crab leg.#and i resent the notion that kim will completely overhaul who he is for harry's sake#+ kim is in a delicate position as a nonwhite companion to a white protag so. not great yknow#im white so i don't want to presume too much but that's definitely worth pointing out. the game addresses it only briefly#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#kiwipost#kk meta#hdb meta
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A Zooble stimboard!
🔵-🟨-🔸
🔺- x -⚡
💜-⭕-➰
#stimboard#tadc#the amazing digital circus#zooble#tadc zooble#moodboard#stim#food#candy#pouring#toys#fursuit#furry#fur#soap cutting#knife#knife tw#puzzle#fidget spinner#stim toy#stim toys#spinning#pop it#pop it fidget toy#kandi#necklace#beach toys#crab#crab claw#clay cracking
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can i just get like. a Void Fiend from Risk of Rain 2 stimboard. My baby is neglected by the fandom </3
Themes:
purple
crabs
glowing stuff
things cracking and falling apart and stuff
Ok!
💜|💫|🌑
🌫|🔮|♠️
⛓️|🗝|🖤
Void Fiend stimboard
Requested by: @irusanw4
Themes: Purple, crabs, glowing, clay cracking
Song:
#risk of rain#risk of rain 2#void fiend#purple#purplecore#crab#glow in the dark#glow aesthetic#glowcore#clay cracking#visual stim#stimboard#stimblr#stim gifs#stimming#stim#fymo stims#fymo answers#fymos moots
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Let's try again....
Made a better poll because I forgot what is clearly the best option.
Tasmanian giant crab:
Christmas Island red crab:
Snow crab:
Sand/mole/peekytoe crab:
Japanese spider crab:
Fiddler crab:
Blue crab:
Ghost crab:
Hermit crab:
Vampire crab:
Coconut crab:
Horseshoe crab:
#tolkien#tolkien legendarium#silmarillion#tolkien headcanons#my polls#tolkien polls#tolkien crack#Crablor#maglor#Macalaurë#He's a fiddler crab#Just look at his eyestalks! :3#:3#crabs
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So tomorrow we only have a half day and I managed to convince my friend to spend the rest of the day watching season 1 of H2O with me.
I'm so fucking excited.
#Tonight I shall crack open the finest TV show and celebrate by watching Shipwrecked to Bad Moon Rising#[EATS THOSE EPISODES LIKE YOU DEVOUR CRAB LEGS]#MY HYPE LEVELS ARE MAXIMUM#Cruddy rambles
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🔱 → ❝ Sebastian....Why are males so grumpy? I thought Father was the only one. ❞
@rolliesmuses (Sebastian) || mentions: @jimbo-spacehawk - 🫧🌊
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